▼ at Blackout
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▼ at Blackout

Blackout November 1th 2014


We went to the latest edition of Blackout Eindhoven with a really crazy line up, like every time!
Together with Elmar van Eijk we did an interview with The Illuminated along with a review for this event.

Elmar: So, another Blackout! The heaviest drum n bass party our beautiful and liberal country has to offer. I’m quite ashamed to admit this is only my second Blackout ever, but I do know that the previous Blackout in Eindhoven was one of the greatest experiences of my year. It was also the party on which my ear drums were permanently damaged so I’ve been walking around with earplugs ever since to prevent even more damage. Something you guys should all consider too, by the way!

Anyway, when the line-up announcement was made, I was very proud to see my friends from The Illuminated were booked too. These guys are going stronger than ever and some major raves in the country has booked them this year.  I also saw the name Misanthrop on the list, which would be the highest ranking DJ on my list of drum n bass artists still to see. AND Rockwell, who’s had some MASSIVE releases this year. AND Joe Ford, who has put out some of the heaviest tracks I have. AND Black Sun Empire, who need no introduction unless you’re roommates with Patrick Star (who lives under a rock just like you). Needless to say, I was stoked. Psyched. AND NOW IT’S PARTY TIME!!!!

I promised Joep and Yuri that I would be the first person inside the venue when they were to open the night and I kept it. While saying hi to them, I hear some really deep ass dubstep going around. It’s REALLY deep but it still hits pretty hard. I’m usually not into these kinds of tunes so I can’t tell you which they are but I CAN tell you that you should have been here to hear it. Wow!

Danny: The Illuminated are 3 really inspiring, cool guys. Just like Elmar said, they are booked at lots of parties lately. And it’s going to be the 2nd time they are going to get the crowd warmed up at 50Hurtz! (this time x Major League) this weekend. You can read one of the craziest interviews you may ever read with them later! In the main area there are some really weird dance moves going on right now. Even though it’s Blackout, the warm-up from the sounds of The Illuminated has some really good vibes! It looks like the crowd is waiting for the massive Drum and Bass that’s yet to come though.

Elmar:
Some true words about The Illuminated and the dance moves, Danny! After half an hour, Joep decides there’s been enough dubstep and he pitches that bitch up to half time drum n bass tempo and he does it with an absolute fucking banger. Let’s ask which one it is!

Wow, surprise. Yuri yells that it’s actually a dubstep track they play at drum n bass speed. Talk about creativity! After this it’s ooooooooon with the jungle. I love it! There’s a track involved that I actually know in the form of Minimal Funk by Icicle. They turn up the heaviness after a while and the room, which is getting pretty flooded with ravers by now, gets soaked in heavy bass, which is no surprise when you pump the Spor and Noisia collab Falling Through through the sound system. Once again the sound is spot on in De Effenaar!

The set is an hour underway now and we are already quite full in here. And aaaaaaaaaaaaight Yuri suddenly throws Stigma by Noisia. This would be the first time I’m sweating tonight because there’s no standing still to this tune. Afterwards they play Sanctum by Audio which I didn’t even know before this and I’m ashamed for that now.
After some more heavy tunes they load up a disc with John Holt – Police in Helicopter and that would be the end of their massive two hour opening set full of surprises and bass line twists. These guys are really talented and are definitely the ones to watch.

Before I have the honour of interviewing these guys alongside my fellow compadre and All Electronic Music owner Danny, I’m witnessing the opening tunes of Rockwell. I do not know what the first tune is, but the second thing he plays is either a MASSIVE remix of Dreadnaught, or a brilliant double drop. He also spins the Annix Remix of Put It On by State of Mind, which I believe to be the first ever jump up tune released on Blackout Records ever. JUUUUUUUMP UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPP!!!!

Danny:
One thing I need to say is that the previous Blackout, the edition with DC Breaks and State Of Mind was way more crowded. The curtains of the venue where closed for tonight. When it’s really crowded, they open up the curtains for a couple of 100 more visitors so there’s more space.

Elmar: You are right about that man, it’s a lot less crowded than last time, even though I feel like they’ve really outdone themselves with this line-up. But now, it’s finally time for my massive interview with The Illuminated. We take the elevator up to the backstage area of De Effenaar and sit down for what will turn out to be one of the funniest interviews you’ll ever read. Read about them puking, arguing, hating on anal sex and Yuri’s possible involvement in human trafficking!


1980276_10152385247419416_658200307_oThe Illuminated interview:

Elmar: Hi Yuri and Joep, a pleasure! Let’s kick this shit off with a really relevant question! What’s your favourite memory of eachother, preferably in a drunk state?
Yuri: My favourite memory of Joep in a drunk state… Hengelo! It was Niek Kuipers’ party, called Scherp. We hadn’t eaten anything that night but had drank a lot of whiskey cola and also smoked a whole lot of weed. A friend of Niek was there and he had really strong haze on him. Right before we had to go on stage, Joep walked in backstage with eyes red as fire. It was Niek’s birthday and he had also received two boxes of Flügel. And before we started on those, we had already had those whisky cola’s! After the party we ordered a taxi van and it was racing over the road. We arrived at this roundabout and there was a smaller road next to it that we had to get on. So the driver makes a 180 degree U-turn at full speed, and this is when Joep says “maybe we should pull over.” Residential area, pretty hedges. Joep gets out and instantly pukes all over the place, while we were still emptying the last shots of Flügel, hahahaha! Joep, you slept with a bucket next to your bed for the rest of the night, right?
Joep: Yeah, but I didn’t really need it anymore.
Yuri: So who was the one who had thrown up all over the toilet?
Joep: Steven! (Steven Hesk, Soundcloud link over here – red)
Yuri: Oh, right! We were in Annie’s house (Niek’s mother), and that toilet was completely covered in puke in the morning. I was the first one downstairs, and then more people came down and they all asked “Hey, who puked all over the toilet?” You saw Steven look reaaaally busted then, hahaha!
Joep: All I remember is that we got out of the van at some point and the rest is just gone. One of the few times I just have a few hours of memory missing. I’m not that much of a drinker. Anyway, Yuri’s finest moment was Poland! It was the first time we were in Poland, and we were just fed loads of alcohol by the promoter there. There was more wodka than we could count and we had a huge amount of it. At some point that night, Yuri was just gone. You just left!
Yuri: After our gig?
Joep: Yeah, after the gig. You had just randomly left while we went there with the four of us. You, me, Timber and Ben. With the latter I ended up going back to the apartment with them in the end. To get into the complex you had to have a code that I remembered. When we walked up to the room we found the door standing open in a 45 degree angle and Yuri was there face down on the couch with all his clothes still on! We had agreed that that was his spot though so it’s not like he hijacked the bed or anything, haha! We spent the next few hours smoking weed in the next room and throwing stuff out of the window!
Yuri: The only thing I still remember is that I woke up and within 90 minutes we had to get the car and drive back.
Joep: Yeah we got back home in the middle of the night
Yuri: The first three hours of the drive back, I didn’t have a focus point. Every time I looked somewhere it was one big blur.
Joep: But it was a great party!
Yuri: Yeah it was really awesome. It was one big, dark basement. You had to use your phone’s flashlight to browse through your CD’s. The only light in the room came from a light behind the DJ booth.

Elmar: What does the perfect party look like, according to you?
Joep: The perfect party….
Yuri: Poland! But yeah, lets speak for ourselves.  For me, it would just be some random dark cave with a fucking sick sound system and very little light.
Elmar: So just fucking underground?
Yuri: Yes, with vibrating scrotum.
Joep: Yeah, just a space that has a capacity of max 200, you know?
Danny: I already thought you’d say something like that
Joep: Yeah well, tonight we were playing in the main hall of the venue and that’s fucking awesome you know? But when push comes to shove we strongly prefer the underground vibes. That’s why we host Breek in the small area, that’s really our thing.

Elmar: Where did you get the name The Illuminated?
Joep: Okay, shall I explain this? It’s pretty simple. It’s two things, basically, because you pick a name because it rocks in multiple ways. None of us really comes from Eindhoven but this ís our true home as a group. This is where we met each other, where we’ve produced all of our music and stuff like that. And Eindhoven is the “Lichtstad” (which translates as Light City because of Philips – red). We feel really at home here and we want to represent that. It’s in our sound too. The dark, industrial, bare and minimal sound fits this city. And we’re also really connected with the soul and core of dubstep. We really dig the roots. The Illuminated could also mean the enlightened, knowledge having. We’ve always been interested in what happened in dubstep before we got into it. It’s important to know where your style originated.
Yuri: It’s a piece of education.
Joep: Yeah exactly, and that’s the way we see it when we perform, too. That we possess this knowledge. And if we can share some of this information with others we take great pride in that. That’s what our gigs are all about too, which is why our sets have constantly changing sounds.
Danny: So that explains the lamp in your logo!
Yuri: It does
Danny: So it has got nothing to do with the Illuminati?
Yuri: Nope, nothing whatsoever. It’s more a joke, especially these days. We get weekly messages from South Africans asking us if they can join the Illuminati. No Joke! We have people posting on our page “How can I join you” blablabla.

Elmar: What’s the greatest gig you’ve ever performed at?
Yuri: Hmm, good question, I’ve been thinking about that just recently. For me it’s Outlook, but that was very strange for me because I performed without Joep. Normally we always do it together.
Joep: For me it’s really difficult. Earlier this year we went back to Poland for a soundclash. We prepared for that by making some special tunes for that and also bringing some dubplates.
Yuri: It was the party of our label boss, Mack who owns Moonshine and New Moon. He also released our tune Scavenger and Truth among others! He throws a party every three months.
Joep: We could finally meet our boss. He’s the one that released our shit and god knows what else is in it for us.
Yuri: The fact that we could do our own thing rocked too.
Joep: Yeah we played a lot of our own shit.
Yuri: It was a soundclash so you’re actually musically battling your opposition. This was Adam Prescott.
Joep: We were really dedicated to the cause. We brought some dubplates by TMSV and other great artists and also some tracks like the Eindhoviah VIP that we made just for this night. In the end, we were still beaten big time! Adam brought Jamaican dubplates to the party and shit.
Yuri: Yeah, we were murdered to our assholes but for us it didn’t even matter. It was just really sick.

Elmar: Which one of you has the best style?
Yuri: In the sense of?
Elmar: Appearance.
Yuri: Style…. I think Maarten haha, he’s quite the swaggerboy.
Joep: Neh, Maarten isn’t a swaggerboy but he does dedicate himself to look good.

Elmar: Which one of you has the best taste in music?
Yuri: That’s highly disputable. Every person has a different view on that. I think the cool thing about us is that we all come from different genres and in the end we do make really cool stuff. Whenever we send WIP’s to each other, Maarten’s got a different influence on the tunes, Joep has got that, and so do I. We all learn from each other.
Joep: It’s kind of always been our thing too, to blend in different genres.


So, after the first part of the interview comes to a close, so does Rockwell’s set. Just as I’m entering the stage from backstage, he chooses his new badass dnb banger 1 2 3 4 to be his closing tune. The crowd seems pretty hyped up so it must have been a tremendous set by the stylish DJ.

Misanthrop is already plotting which tune to start his set with but whatever it is, I know two things.

  1. This is going to be sick.
  2. I have no idea which fucking tune this is but GOD I want it

After this, it’s Undertaker by The Upbeats and the Blackout crowd does what a Blackout crowd does best: SKANK. THEIR. ASSES. OFF. The crowd is absolutely losing it. A quick peek at the smoking area shows that most people are upstairs now. And that’s where I’m headed again.
Danny: Misanthrop, holy fucking hell, what a set. I see Mr. Multiplex, one of the most talented MC’s around here going hard in the crowd, hyping people up even more. The party has officially gone wild.
Elmar: Indeed, Multiplex has got his mic with him wherever he goes. He carries it into the smoking area, even! He’ll turn that thing on when walking back upstairs and starts MC-ing when he’s not even fully up yet! He’ll walk through the crowd spitting the most insane stuff through the mic and I don’t even think most people realize he’s the MC until they see him crawling up the stage.

Alright, we still have a lot of talking with The Illuminated to do so we’re taking the elevator backstage again and it’s time for the second round of our massive interview with some hilarious moments!


The Illuminated interview:

Elmar: Well, gentlemen now including Maarten, time for round two! What if the two of you (Joep and Yuri) were to get married, which one of you would become the female?
Maarten: JOEP! Hahahahaahhahha. I think Joep would be the girl!
Yuri: Yeah he’s got the longest hair. And he’s the best singer!
Elmar: Can you sing? Sing us something!
Joep: (Starts to sing a random tune horribly off key)
Yuri: And he hits évery note!
Joep: (Still singing really off key and horribly high pitched)
Maarten: You’ve got the most female attributes too!
Joep: Hahahaha thanks! I bet you’ve got me a beer!

Elmar: Hahahaha alright, which one of you would be the hottest girl then?
Joep: ME! I’ll be that too then, damn it!
Yuri: Well I’d say Maarten because he just has the babyface going. I think if you would put some make-up on him he’d be quite a sexy bitch.
Maarten: I actually do that a lot!
Yuri: I’m just not really into short hair.
Maarten: I put make up on a lot and it makes me look really sexy!

Elmar: If someone was to make a movie about your lives, who would star in it as you?
Joep: Who plays me? Salma Hayek! Hahaha no, Owen Wilson would!
Maarten: The actor to play me would be Will Ferrell!
Yuri: Yeah, and it’s not just the comparison. You just have to be fucking nuts to be able to play
Maarten. I think a combination of Will Ferrell and Theo Maassen… No, the guy from Crank! Ehhh…
Elmar: Oh, Jason Statham?!
Yuri: Yes, him!
Elmar: And who would play you?
Yuri: When I used to have long hair people called me Antonio Banderas!

Elmar: Where do you get your musical inspiration from?
Yuri: Everywhere and nowhere.
Joep: Virtually anything with soul. Things that don’t sound plastic, simple or prefab.

Elmar: If the other were a country, which country would it be?
Yuri: POLAND! Joep is Poland!
Maarten: Bolivia! I’m Bolivia. That’s who I want to be. My own me, you know? People who live on gut feeling and don’t think and just do things. And I do a lot of things that I think about a whole lot, which is why I do them. But I wanna do things impulsively, so for me Bolivia is just a true factor to do things.
Yuri: I’d say ehmm… Hawaii isn’t a country and I’ve never been there, but from what I gather about the place is that it’s a really quiet and peaceful place. No stress. I can handle it but that would be the best for me.

Elmar: How long do you guys think you’ll keep doing what you do?
Yuri: Until we die.
Maarten: I think 13 and a half months. Then, we have to recalibrate. Should we continue? And that’ll take 1 second and then we keep going!
Yuri: And then another 14 and a half months!
Maarten: You just can’t answer that, nobody can tell.

Elmar: What are your day to day rituals?
Maarten: Wow that’s a great question, I’m always interested in that stuff!
Yuri: (Pointing at Joep) Smoking weed, haha!
Elmar: What about Maarten’s ritual?
Yuri: Maarten is always trying to organize things. Not in the sense of lining things up but just organizing everything.
Joep: Yeah but you (looking at Maarten) meditate too, so you try to organize yourself too!
Elmar: And what about you, Yuri?
Yuri: MY rituals?
Maarten: You (Yuri) are kind of the business man in that sense.
Elmar: Yeah I mean it more like, the things you do when you wake up or go to bed. Like kicking out your undies and catching them with your head or something.
Joep: When he wakes up he has a cup of coffee and a cigarette.
Yuri: Yup, that’s it.

Elmar: Which one of you had the most trouble leaving puberty?
Yuri: Maarten!
Maarten: FUCK! Haha. Yeah at one point in my life I had this voice in my head saying “develop yourself” and I was all like “No fuck that and fuck you”
Yuri: It’s not necessarily a bad thing though.
Maarten: So I stayed in puberty the longest?
Yuri: Yeah I think so.

Elmar: Okay guys, let’s do one more question for now because we’ve been sitting here for ages and I have to write more review too.
Maarten: Will there be a part 2 then?
Elmar: This is already part 2! Maybe we’ll stop at five parts! Okay, last question for now: When was the last time you had a big fight?
Maarten: Oh, that’s another really nice question! Hmm. An actual fight or just an argument?

Elmar: Whatever’s big for you guys.
Yuri: We did have a sort of misunderstanding at the Underslung Audio Showcase back in April. I was just way too drunk. Nothing Joep said stuck with me. MAD drunk.
Joep: He was even smoking on stage! I told him to put it out but he didn’t. When a security guard walked up to him, he decided it would actually be smart to do it yet, though. Allowed him to stay, haha!
Yuri: The only thing I can still remember was waking up, grabbing my phone and reading about some things I did the night before.
Joep: You were supposed to take a cab with Maikel too.
Yuri: Yeah exactly. Maikel had torn his knee ligaments and I was supposed to get a taxi home with him but I was just like YOOOO TAXI byebyeeeee guys! Micha was with me and he was still semi-sober so he took me home. I accidentally stepped on my cat twice too, once on the tail and once on the leg. Then Micha put me in bed.
Maarten: I’d like to conclude by saying I used to want to have things my way all the time, but now it’s more general, just accept it the way it is. It makes having conflicts harder. If you just accept the way they are and that there are differences and nothing everything can go your way, you can achieve a lot more.


When we get back downstairs, Misanthrop is just about done with his set and it’s time for the great Joe Ford, a man I’ve been a fan of for a little over two years now. Back then, NOBODY knew him and look where he is now!

He’s standing right in front of me, actually, playing Oh Oh by Noisia after he’s opened his set with some ear shattering insanity that I tried to Shazam. It didn’t work though so it’s time to commit hara kiri on my phone. He gives Feed The Machine a spin. I wish I could stay in the main area longer but it’s already time to do the final questions for the interview (we said it would be huge and we didn’t lie now did we?) and hopefully be in time for the Joe Ford ending. But for now, it’s the elevator up to the backstage area with the entire crew again, and down we sit for the third and last time today with what is by far the funniest piece of interview I’ve ever conducted in my life.


The Illuminated interview:

Elmar: What would you like to say to any aspiring DJ that hopes to one day make it as far as you?
Joep: Beatmatch. Done.
Yuri: Play what you like, not what others like.
Danny: Wise words!

Elmar: What would you say to the other if you found out he had just one more day to live?
Yuri: Jesus, that’s one tough question right there. (Pointing at Joep) We’re going for a parachute jump because you’re afraid of heights! That’d definitely be one of the things.
Elmar: Bucketlist, right? Anybody else?
Joep: I’m not good at this stuff man, not a la minute. This is something else.
Maarten (who’s walking in now): Yo!
Rest: Yo!
Maarten: What was the question?
Elmar: Imagine the other one has one more day to live, what would you tell him?
Maarten: Sucks for you!
Yuri: I’d say, tequila?
Joep: I’d say something really meaningful that I’d have to think about.

Elmar: What do you guys do outside of producing and DJ-ing?
Yuri: Pooping and breathing. Gaming, watching series and movies, chilling with the boys, go to work.
Maarten: Digging.

Elmar: If you were a drink, which one would you be?
Yuri (pointing at Maarten): Whiskey! I think we’d all be whiskey.
Joep: I’m a blonde beer for sure.
Maarten: Or a vodka Fristy.

Elmar: What would The Illuminated be, if it were a dish?
Joep: A kapsalon, haha!
Everybody laughs and agrees!

Elmar: What if it were a brand?
Joep: UNICEF.
Elmar: Or Döner Company or something, haha.
Maarten: Google?
Yuri: Let’s take a bit of everything and get to the core of this!
Maarten: Tefal.
Joep: Tefal hahaha, you think about everything.
Yuri: Yeah we’re getting to the bottom of this.
Joep: Why don’t we just say Philips?
Yuri: Philips….
Maarten: Philips!
Joep: Philips is very diverse too!

Elmar: Philips, right, you guys are Philips! And what if you were a means of transportation?
Maarten: A bike.
Elmar: Just a bike?

Maarten: Hm yeah…
Yuri: Dude, you bike to work every day. It’s 45 minutes there and 45 minutes back. You’re a cyclist all day!
Joep: We do cycle, but it’s not like that’s what we are then. We’re more like a BMW or ehhh…
Maarten: A rocket!
Yuri: A means of transportation could also be a Gazelle.
Elmar: Yeah or a giraffe!
Yuri: No a gazelle bike!
Elmar: Okay, you’re a gazelle bike!
Maarten: Could be a giraffe too!

Elmar: And what if you were a superhero? Catwoman?

Maarten: Jesus!
Joep: Aquaman. You can talk to the fishes.
Maarten: DMT-man! You know him?
Elmar: Nope, but I bet he’s high as a kite.
Joep: If we were a superhero, we’d be Jamaican Tour Guide!

Elmar: What if The Illuminated were a footballer?

Yuri: Wow, this is something we’re gonna need to discuss.
Joep: It has to be someone who plays with character.
Maarten: A player that was all over the pitch, you know?
Elmar: Zidane? Gerrard?
Joep: It shouldn’t be someone who’s too frivolous. Think Theo Janssen.
Yuri: Or a Ronaldo? Just because of his own style.
Joep: Ronaldo da Sousa Faria.
Maarten: That’s Romario, asshole! Goddamn it, you clearly aren’t a PSV fan!
Joep: No I’m not hahahaha.
Maarten: Yeah, thought so! Why not just Penders?
Everybody laughs out loud.
Joep: Or should we say Sami Hyypia hahaha.
Maarten: No, Michael Aerts!
Yuri: What was that keeper from The Hague called? The one with the dildo collection?
Joep: Or Kenneth Perez?
Yuri: Yeah. With his ugly ass fuckface.
Maarten: Hmm, could be Kenneth Perez.
Joep: But yeahh… If we were a footballer we’d be….
Yuri: You guys get to decide.
Maarten: Yeah I’m thinking of someone like van Bommel. Just someone who was just doing random stuff.
Joep: What’s that Danish ex-winger from PSV called?
Maarten: OH RIGHT! Rommedahl!
Joep: Dennis Rommedahl.
Elmar. Dennis Rommedahl?
Yuri: Yes!
Elmar: Okay, you’ll be Dennis Rommedahl.

Elmar: Okay, one of you guys getting arrested. What would it be for?

Yuri (pointing at Maarten): Coke!
Joep: No hahaha. Maarten would get himself arrested for confronting the police.
Elmar: Okay, so Maarten because he’d start foulmouthing the cops?
Yuri: Yes.
Elmar: Okay and why is Yuri busted? Rape? Murder?
Maarten: He’s more of a human trafficking kind of person!
Everybody laughs really loud right now.
Joep: I can remember that time you fell into that other drunk dude with your bike!
Yuri: Yeah we had just gotten our salary for the month!
Joep: We were all fucking hammered and he walked into this guy who was fucking drunk too. He fell over his bike and that guy gave you a whack and in a reflex you kicked him right on the floor because you stumbled over your bike. The police was two yards away standing in front of Snack Time.
Danny: Yeah there are always cops there!
Yuri: Yeah and then I tackled him because I hit his knee space haha!
Joep: Yeah, that’s what’d get Yuri busted.
Elmar: So he’d get arrested for unintentional misdemeanor haha!
Maarten: And how would Joep get himself arrested?
Yuri: For smoking weed where he’s not supposed to. On a platform at the station!
Elmar: Okay, Joep is doing time for smoking weed at the train station haha!

Elmar: Okay guys, what were the others in a previous life and what will they become in their next?

Maarten: I think Yuri would be…
Elmar: A rhododendron?
Joep and Yuri: Hahahahaha. A whát?
Maarten (pointing at Yuri): I think you used to be a bull.
Yuri: Yeah my horoscope is taurus. We share the same birthday!
Maarten: Yeah you’ll definitely become a giraffe. You learn to look out over things better all the time. A giraffe is also overlooking the big picture like, okay, this is what I have to do. Not that you’re in the mass and think about how much of a chaos it is.
Maarten: A taurus. It’s just a taurus thing. A taurusgiraffe. A mix. A taurus is like, if I have doubts I’ll just go that way and everybody should just join me, and if not I’ll go alone. Bam. That’s a taurus right there.
Elmar: What about Maarten?
Joep: What Maarten used to be in a previous life?
Elmar: Yes, and what he’ll become in the next.
Joep: Maarten is an ehhmmm… Yeah I dunno. I find it hard to think about it, it could have been anything. You say it was a fuchsia, or what was it?
Elmar: Rhododendron!
Joep: Neh, I’ll stick to people. I think Maarten was something of a motivator. A motivational Speaker.
Yuri: I’d say a cat. Because he’s really stubborn and does his own thing. But what would he become?
Joep: Yeah he’s got that subtle shyness too.
Maarten: Subtle shyness?? I looooove how that sounds haha!
Joep: YEAH just like the stance you just took (a little huddled and raising his shoulders) is exactly what I mean haha! It’s a bit of a cat stance.
Elmar: And what’ll he become?
Joep: What will he become…
Yuri: That fox from Kung Fu Panda!
Everybody laughs.
Yuri: Who was it again, Dennis Hoffman or something…
Maarten: Dustin Hoffman!
Elmar: He’ll become Dustin Hoffman?
Yuri: Yeah but he’ll be the fox from Kung Fu Panda.
Elmar: And what was Joep in his previous life? A weed plant?
Joep: We were talking about animals right?
Maarten: I told Yuri how I see him so Yuri gets to do Joep.
Yuri: Yeah I’m thinking guys………. I think Joep will eventually be a dolphin, purely because he’s able to communicate better than any other mammal in this world?
Elmar: And what did he use to be?
Yuri: What did he use to be, hmm…… One of these Samson dogs!
Joep: A border collie or something. Just a fun dog!
Maarten: Don’t give your own answer!
Yuri: He does listen to the people that matter but he can make his own choices, that’s what animals do too.

Elmar: What are your best characteristics?

Maarten: Let’s all name a characteristic per person so we get three! I’m good at math.
Joep: Also insight!
Elmar: Okay, Maarten says math. Joep, you say he’s got insight. Yuri, what about Maarten?
Joep: I think I’ve just got empathy.
Maarten: Joep’s best characteristic is that he thinks out of the box.
Yuri: Joep is everybody’s friend!
Maarten: No, I don’t think he is.
Yuri: He can get along with everybody.
Maarten: Joep is a great out of the box thinker. It’s like when you’re cooking some dish and you think hey, this’ll be tasty and he will throw in some random sauce and you think WHAT? That’s ridiculous, and it’s fucking delicious!
Elmar: So Joep just always throws in the proper sauce. Nice!
Maarten: Yeah, whenever you’re like hey, I don’t know it anymore, he’ll just look up and be like THAT ONE. And that’s when you go, thanks!, and just continue. That’s Joep!
Elmar: What about Yuri?
Joep: Yuri’s best characteristic?
Elmar: Surely the beard?
Yuri: Yeahh… Then it became silent……
Joep: You know, the thing that Yuri has always been the best in, is the business insight. His analytic talents.
Maarten: Seeing the big picture and spotting what’s necessary. Thats his strenght.
Joep: We’re the ones that would normally just go head first into a beat and he’ll still be looking at the big picture. Maarten can sit on small things that only take up seconds in a track for hours. That’s when you end up with sick stuff happening in them all of a sudden. Yuri is all about the big picture.
Maarten: Not even just the beat but just the overall direction we’re headed and trusting that too. That’s your strength, Yuri. It doesn’t mean you can’t go into detail but you just choose to have a specific role in it. That’s a choice because you can’t do everything by yourself.

Elmar: Okay, now for a tough one: What’s the other’s worst characteristic?

Yuri: All three of us are FUCKING stubborn.
Joep: Yes we are hahaha!
Yuri: But that actually makes for a great chemistry between the three of us. I mean that for real. Joep is stubborn. I’m stubborn. Maarten is stubborn. That makes us The Illuminated.
Yuri: We have a high acceptancy level for each other mainly because we’re all really stubborn.
Elmar: So all your worst characteristics are also your strenghts?
Yuri: They don’t contribute all the time but we do have the ability to listen to each other’s stick. But if we were to talk to another very stubborn person, like an Elmar… (ha-ha) …I just can’t agree with them. It’s just different. Another chemistry.

Elmar: Okay, three more questions and it’s a wrap. What would you like to say to each other? Now. On the record. For once and always.

Maarten: Love you guys.
Yuri: Love you guys, that’s for sure.

Elmar: What would you like to say to raving Holland and the readers of the interview?

Yuri: Go to the parties you wanna go to, not the ones your friends go to.
Elmar: Nice. Do the ladies agree?
Maarten: You’ve got an attitude. Everybody’s got that. Determined behavior. It’s good when you see that and can let it slide and just feel the love at a party. The way you behave isn’t that important. Don’t put yourself in the first place, put the party there. Feel the vibe. At night, we all become one. The feeling you get when that happens, is something you should take with you in your life.
Yuri: I have a problem with that sometimes when I’m sober. I can really get annoyed by people when I walk in somewhere and haven’t smoked or drank anything yet.

Elmar: What are your last famous words? Whatever you wanna get off your chest, get it out!

Maarten: Anal sex sucks.
Yuri: I think it’s nice. Nice and tight around the dick.
Elmar: Joep is breeding on something, you can see him thinking! There are going to be some filthy things said soon! Or he’s preparing a fart, that’s another possibility.
Maarten: An ass just isn’t a place for a dick to go in.
Elmar: We’ll censor you when you say something that’s too much, Joep. We’ll blur your eyes!
Maarten: I think Madonna is really sexy.
Yuri: I still have the hots for Tjatjana. We talked about that a while back!
Maarten: But neighbour, what are you doing (Maar buurman, wat doet u nu – quote van Flodder – red)
Elmar: OOOOH that Tjatjana!
Yuri: Flodder! She’s 54 and dons a moustache now.
Joep: My last famous words are: just do fun things.
Maarten: Why make it so difficult?
Yuri: Don’t think too long about things. Enjoy while you’re young, enjoy while you’re old.
Maarten: Don’t overcomplicate things.
Yuri: Eyes on the price.
Elmar: Well boys, I guess that’s a rep! Thankyou for your time and for the great conversation. This is going to be a great read!
Yuri: Yeah, we really enjoyed it my man!


So after this humongous beast of an interview is finally over, I rush my ass back down the elevator one last time tonight but I’m just too late to catch the Joe Ford ending. But hey, on the upside, it’s Black Sun fucking Empire taking over now, and in retrospect, it was one of the sickest hours of drum n bass I’ve experienced all year.

It’s just one of the BSE guys manning the decks tonight and he’s coming up with some ridiculous tunes at the beginning of his set. I don’t know any of them but they’re so loud that I’m close to stomping random people down in a blind rage of heavenly drum n bass aggression. Out of nowhere he drops Ed Rush’ new masterpiece Scarabs and I have a feeling that the people around me are starting to feel the same way about the stomping people down. WHAT. A. TUNE.

The bass is insane today, I really love the Effenaar soundsystem. Multiplex is still doing what he does best too: running around the entire building spitting virtuously into the mic. Sick ass rhymes to go with a sick ass drum n bass set. I think I have to become religious because Jesus Christ this shit is loud and God help me because my earplugs can barely save me from this amount of bass.

Danny: A very big up to the visual crew too! WERC has never let me down in the things they build and beam on the visual screens. It keeps getting better and better what they do with lights. Unbelievable.

Elmar: I have to agree with you there. The stage, although simple, looks really nice and the visuals are spot on. Great show!

The problem with Black Sun Empire for me is that I’m not really that much into their productions. But the more I see them live, the more I start appreciating what they do and make. Whatever the fuck they’re dropping now is absolutely sick.

Let me rephrase that, actually: Black Sun Empire are right now dropping one of the most quality sets I’ve seen or heard all year. This is some world class DJ-ing right here. Wow. Speechless. Right now I’m standing in the right corner in the back of the main area alongside Yuri, and what they play us NOW… This has got to be one of the most insane half time tracks I’ve ever heard. I look at Yuri and he’s shaking his head in disbelief, telling me it’s absolutely ridiculous. We bot haven’t go the slightest clue which track this could be. Even when I asked Black Sun Empire after the show which track it was, he couldn’t remember it. That, and I didn’t really have time to describe it because security wanted us all out ASAP. The last track is another dubplate that pushes the boundaries of what should be legal drum n bass tunes. I actually think that the majority of the set consisted of unreleased Blackout Music material and I’ll tell you this: If that’s true, then Blackout may just be releasing the heaviest drum n bass tunes of all the big labels next year. I’m absolutely stunned by what I just heard.

I feel really content after this Blackout. Satisfied too. The music was quality from start to finish but it was never boring or repetitive. Every single DJ had a very distinctive own style but nobody even remotely disappointed on the night. The crowd was really up for it and everything just worked out greatly. I will see all of you ravers at the next one! Big up Black Sun Empire for pulling off another great Blackout and playing a destructive live set!